Bound with Ice
by Laugh Until You Obitine
Summary: A look inside of Elsa's head as the initial events of Frozen unfold. Oneshot. I took a little liberty with the argument between Anna and Elsa, but the rest should be relatively canon.


Elsa gazed pensively out the window, melancholy dusting her soul like the frost on the pane.

_This is it._ This was the day of reckoning for the queen to be. _Conceal, don't feel. Don't let it show. _

Her powers had flourished since her parent's death, almost feeding off of her grief. It was impossible to govern herself, especially under the realization that she feared herself. She feared what she could do, if she wasn't careful.

_But it's only for today, _Elsa consoled herself. But, on the subject of today, she would have to control her powers, despite the strong feelings threatening to overcome her.

She carefully slipped her gloves off and picked up a candlestick and snuffbox, practice for the later ceremony. The metal felt cool and alien on her naked hands, leading to a current of emotions. A thin layer of ice began to spread on the objects, originating from her palms.

Horrified, Elsa hastily wrapped her hands back in her gloves. _I need more practice. But it's only for today. _

After today, they could close up the gates and plunge her back into her self-imposed exile.

That was what she wanted, wasn't it?

Elsa exhaled deeply, tilting her chin up and allowing her eyes to slide shut. She had done it! Besides for a slight slip-up with the frost brushing the bottoms of the items, no one was explicitly tipped off about her unnatural powers. Her secret was safe.

Elsa contentedly surveyed the scene. It seemed that her first party was a success.

_First and last. _She thought to herself. No need for anyone else to know that, though.

Her sister Anna seemed to materialize before her, dragging with her a handsome young boy in his teens.

"Elsa! This is Hans, of the Southern Isles. He- Well, he and I…"

Anna was giggling slightly, and Elsa wondered if she was always like this. She had essentially been introduced to her sister an hour ago, in a pleasant conversation that was a blur of endearing awkward behavior and small talk about chocolate.

She arched an eyebrow at her sister. "Him and you… what, exactly?" She was glad to find that her sister was making friends. Perhaps she did not have to doom her sister to the same imprisonment by fear that she would have to inflict on herself.

"He and I- _giggle_- well, we're going to get married!"

This declaration hit Elsa like a pile of bricks, literally knocking the wind out of her. She couldn't believe that her sister would be so foolhardy! What in Arendale would possess her to do something so stupid?!

While inside Elsa was exploding, her demeanor on the outside was calm. Years of concealing and hiding her feelings had prepared her for instances such as these.

Still. It seemed rude to condemn their relationship with Hans watching, so Elsa pleaded to her sister.

"Can I talk to you? In private?"

"No! Anna's arm possessively linked with Hans'. "Whatever you have to say to me, you can say to us both."

That complicated things. _Just be blunt. _

"Fine. You can't marry a man you just met!"

"You can if it's true love!" Anna blurted.

Elsa clenched her fists, desperately trying to ignore the flames of frustration vying for her anger.

_Stoking my irritation to a conflagration will get us nowhere. _She frantically reasoned with herself.

But _why couldn't Anna see that this was a mistake?_ How could someone this idiotically trusting be _related _to her? And why couldn't she _listen _to Elsa? Why was she acting so blind?

"Anna. Please. What do you know about true love?" Elsa closed her eyes, imagining her voice as a straight line. Controlled, to the point, and unstoppable. She must make Anna see reason. With logic.

"More than you!" Anna hotly exclaimed. "All you know how to do is shut people out!"

Elsa winced. She had struck a nerve. She must have _known _that she wasn't proud of her separation from her sister. Guilt flooded her thoughts, clouding her earlier plan.

"You ask for my blessing, but my answer is no. Excuse me." Elsa's thoughts screamed for her to escape as the words rushed out of her mouth, near silent.

She had just turned around when her sister's hot rebuttal flew from her lips.

"I _wasn't _asking for your blessing! I'm old enough to do what I'd like. It's not as though _you _have had any success before this was spoon-fed to you!"

"Anna." Elsa hissed to the sister she could not see. "Not here." The thick silence had cued her to the watching eyes of the party.

"The party is over. Close the gates." Elsa ordered a guard.

Panic flashed in Anna's eyes. "No, no, wait!"

A gasp fled from Elsa's mouth as her sister collided with her, cold fingers clenching her glove.

"Give me my glove!" Elsa dove for the purple glove, hating the tearful edge to her voice. She _needed _the glove. It was the sole physical assurance that her terrifying prowess would **stay **hidden. That scrawny piece of cloth had convinced the entire world that Elsa had no supernatural ability, nothing separating her from the rest of the human race. Maybe it occasionally managed to convince Elsa sometimes.

Elsa couldn't let this continue. She couldn't let her sister question her authority, having stolen the lone contradicting voice in the chorus of doubt. The one suggestion that maybe, just maybe, one day Elsa wouldn't need to be shut away in fear of her powers. That glove was as much a psychological reassurance as it was a physical one.

"Elsa, please, _please, _I can't live like this anymore!" Her sister begged, breaking Elsa's heart clutching the one thing that had held it together.

"Then leave." Elsa's ugly verdict hung in the hall, severing the hopes of reuniting with her childhood friend. She assumed that her eyes mirrored her sisters', widened and glistening with unshed tears.

She drooped her head, driving her concentration to the floor as she wrapped her arms around her body.

"What did I ever do to you?"

The shrill demand was perhaps the last thing Elsa wanted to hear.

"_Enough, _Anna." _Please let it be over. Please stop. Please._

"No, why? Why do you shut me out? Wh-Why do you shut the world out? _**What are you so **__**afraid**__** of?**_"

"I SAID, **ENOUGH**!"

_I almost took that as a challenge, _was Elsa's only thought as her fingertips glided across the scene, a path of icy destruction erupting in their wake. It felt so _right, _so ironically _natural_ to liberate her feelings in this_ unnatural _method.

The sentiment melted away at the sight of Anna and the guests' awestruck faces, distorted with terror.

Elsa froze.

_Please let this be a dream…_


End file.
